I Have A Surprise - Grab A Strainer

I seem to have this ability to see someone's deepest darkest desires. after reading you for long enough, i have come to the conclusion that you are a very dirty boy! don't even act like you aren't. i pull out a strainer and you seem perplexed. here, take this strainer and follow me! we go into the bathroom and you still feel pretty confused. i plop down on the toilet and start to take a huge dump! phew that stinks! i begin to explain what we are doing in here. i've decided to take up baking! once i finish on the throne, you are going to come over here and strain my dookie out! you will then proceed to the kitchen and put it into a mixing bowl and i'm going to use this special ingredient to bake all sorts of goodies that you will consume! i rattle off a couple hypothetical things i could make for you! there's a lot that has already come out of me so i'm sure i can make plenty of recipes with this dump alone! hehehe! i bet you can't wait to gobble up anything i present you with!